Jenn Says: Regis Philbin, You May Be 79, But You Are WAY Too Young To Retire!

I even think of you regularly during The O.C. reruns on SoapNet because your daughter Jennifer (what a coincidence) was accomplished enough to write for one of my favorite guilty pleasures!

Truth be told, Regis, I want to thank you — not only for providing me with morning entertainment, but for inspiring me to get Lasik surgery! You even convinced my mother to let me get it — and foot the bill! Like any mother, she only wanted the best for me, so if Dr. Belmont was good enough for you, he was good for me too! Instead of being legally blind, now I don’t even need reading glasses!

• Griselda Netflix Series Stars Sofia Vergara Everything We Know 5165017

So thank you Regis for bringing early morning joy to 20 out of my 23 years of life — I don’t know if I actually processed your witty humor at three, but let’s just go with it — and for procreating more entertainment-savvy children to aid me in my viewing pleasure.

My only regret is that after years of trying to come see you live, I have STILL not had the pleasure. So please don’t retire until I get a chance to come! I’ll even call in “sick” from work — just don’t tell my boss! (I hope she doesn’t read this.)

— Jenn Murray

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